By Alice Boyes, PhD.

Trying to Change Other People's Behaviour So You Can Be Rescued From Uncomfortable Thoughts

Example: I’m going to give a relatively specific example and then explain a much broader general principle. Someone asks you to do something that you think is a thoughtless request. You feel uncomfortable and anxious. – You want the person not to make thoughtless requests of you in the future. – You want other people...

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By Alice Boyes, PhD.

Sharing Some Personal Tips: The Two Minute Rule

I love hearing about the time management tips that other people ACTUALLY use. I thought I’d share some of the tips that I use. The first one is “the two minute rule” and comes from a book called Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity What’s the two minute rule? The two minute rule...

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By Alice Boyes, PhD.

Eating Disorders (Anorexia, Bulimia) and Eating Rules

Lots of people who come to treatment for eating disorders don’t realize that developing rigid rules around eating is a common mechanism of eating disorders. For example, a really common rule is wanting to be the last person to finish eating or to be the last person in the household to eat dinner. Other rules...

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By Alice Boyes, PhD.

Overcoming Binge Eating: Harm Minimization

Back in training I remember being told that the average binge was about 2000 calories (approximately a day’s worth of calories). Binge eating thoughts When people have a sense of having overeaten, they typically think something along the lines of “I’ve blown it, I may as well go for it and binge up large” Other...

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By Alice Boyes, PhD.

A Couple of Quick Tips for Depression

Sometimes when people have depression they grind down to very low activity levels. While you’re working your way back from this, you’re likely to have thoughts like “I can’t do the dishes because I’m tired.” If its depressed-tired rather than you need some rest tired… Try 1 Try asking yourself if you would feel tired...

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By Alice Boyes, PhD.

The Golden Ratio for a Happy Romantic Relationship

Happy relationships generally have a ratio of at least 5:1 positive to negative interactions. Of course its more complicated than this but the 5:1 ratio is a simple yardstick. Studies (e.g. Dr John Gottman’s work) have shown that having at least 5 positive relationship interactions for every 1 negative interaction predicts having good relationship health...

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By Alice Boyes, PhD.

"The Under-Regulation Reset" – Part 2

Following on from my last post (“The Under-Regulation Reset” – Part 1), something else that people who are in the habit of under-regulating their behaviour tend to struggle with is monitoring. Self-Monitoring is a skill that is likely to be useful for you at points so is good to have in your psychological toolbelt. Try...

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By Alice Boyes, PhD.

"The Under-Regulation Reset" – Part 1

Quite a few of the clients I see for problems like depression, anxiety, or low self esteem, have lost (or never had) confidence in committing to consistently doing a particular behaviour in a particular circumstance, independent of the emotions they are experiencing when the time to do that behaviour rolls around. I’ve written previously about...

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By Alice Boyes, PhD.

Behavioural Experiment for Binge eating

Here’s a therapy technique I use with clients that you can try yourself. People who binge eat tend to expect that once they have a strong urge to binge that the urge will stay stuck on strong, making binging uncontrollable and inevitable once the urge has reached a crescendo. My last post was all about...

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By Alice Boyes, PhD.

Do Try This at Home…

This is a therapy exercise I’m currently enamored with, and one that lots of clients are really liking. Its an adapted version of an Acceptance and Commitment Therapy activity. As well as being really effective, it’s easy and not time consuming. Don’t ya love that! Directions This exercise involves taking yourself for a walk around...

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