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    03 2014 January

    A New Year Spring Clean

    I’m a firm believer that decluttering your life helps declutter your mind. One of my favorite things to do in the New Year is cancel a bunch of stuff that I’ve tried out but don’t...

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    29 2012 November

    CBT: How Checking Contributes to Mental Health Problems (Eating Disorders, Depression, Anxiety)

    Although common ‘disorders’ (e.g., eating disorders, anxiety, and depression) look different on the surface, there are some common underlying mechanisms. One of these is checking. I’m going to go explain the role of checking in...

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    10 2012 October

    7 Tips for Not Personalizing

    1. Don’t catastrophize knock backs - If you get a rejection, it doesn’t mean you’re never going to be successful. - If you get negative feedback on a piece of work, it doesn’t mean you...

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    02 2012 October

    5 Tips for Irritability

    1. Do some kind of mindfulness practice. Try this or any of these. Learn enough about the philosophy of mindfulness meditation that you know what you’re doing. Since most people won’t want to do formal...

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    26 2012 September

    Changing Your Cognitive Style

    I mentioned on FB yesterday how much my cognitive style has changed as a result of my psychology training. One of the readers asked me to say more about how it had changed, so here’s...

18 2012 May
By Dr Alice Boyes
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Is This Relationship Right? 10 Relationship Questions to Help You Decide “Should I Stay or Should I Go?”

These are just suggested questions based on research about relationship quality. Matters of the heart are complicated. 1. When we are argue, do either of us express contempt? Contempt is basically the biggest predictor of divorce for married couples. The definition of contempt (in relationships science) is that goes beyond other forms of criticism. It...

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17 2012 May
By Dr Alice Boyes
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10 Fascinating Questions About You To Ask Your Mom (For Adults)

Forward the link for this post to your Mom and ask her to answer. People tend to have more positive and stable close relationships when they know detailed answers to the kinds of questions below. 1. Tell me the story of my delivery? What time of day was I born etc? 2. Do you remember...

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17 2012 May
By Dr Alice Boyes
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11 Dating Questions to Ask Before You Commit

1. Do you ever have a hard time accepting No when you want something? Rationale: Is s/he entitled, disrespectful or needy? 2. If you weren’t doing the job you’re doing now, what would you like to do? Rationale: Does s/he have any big plans for dramatic life changes you don’t know about? 3. Do you...

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15 2012 May
By Dr Alice Boyes
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10 Effortless Stress Relief Techniques

Effortless stress relief techniques for busy people. 1. Accept offers of help. For example, if you’re catering a big event, ask your children to help you. Recruit help if necessary. 2. Treat yourself like you’d treat your best friend. If you’re harassed and harangued, or having self-critical or self-doubt thoughts, recognize that you’re having a...

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15 2012 May
By Dr Alice Boyes
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10 Relationship Questions to Better Understand Your Partner

These relationship questions will help you better understand - why they do what they do - why they get angry - how to talk to them - how to please them 1. When you get home from work and your willpower has been drained by making decisions all day, what do you most need? (or...

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