Christchurch Psychologist. Dr Alice Boyes. Relationships Expert and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT).» Uncategorized

7 Practical Things You Can Do to Become More Comfortable with Emotions

Dr Alice Boyes — Mon, 06 Sep 2010 22:54:45 +0000

There are at least 4 different types of avoiding feelings. 1. avoiding experiencing feelings 2. avoiding expressing feelings 3. avoiding provoking feelings in other people (e.g. avoiding conflict) 4. trying to escape/avoid when other people express strong feelings, or trying to shut down/dial down the other person’s expression or experience of feelings Practical Exercise 1 [...]

7 Practical Things You Can Do to Become More Comfortable with Emotions is a post from: Christchurch Psychologist. Dr Alice Boyes. Relationships Expert and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Copyright 2009-2010. All rights reserved.

Psychological Flexibility – One of the Hallmarks of Psychological Health and Happiness

Dr Alice Boyes — Mon, 06 Sep 2010 09:42:05 +0000

When people are feeling negative emotions (e.g. due to depression, anxiety, or relationship problems), their thinking becomes more negative, narrow, and rigid. People tend to get very “all or nothing” and “black and white.” Achieving greater flexibility in your thinking will help you claw out of the psychological hole of suffering that you are in. [...]

Psychological Flexibility – One of the Hallmarks of Psychological Health and Happiness is a post from: Christchurch Psychologist. Dr Alice Boyes. Relationships Expert and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Copyright 2009-2010. All rights reserved.

Who Will Get Away Unpunished If You Get Unstuck?

Dr Alice Boyes — Mon, 06 Sep 2010 09:20:12 +0000

Relationships Let’s say: You see your partner as controlling. Let’s also say: this has large elements of truth. There are 2 psychological barriers to getting unstuck here 1. If you get unstuck (stop being controlled), your partner would get away unpunished for being controlling (They could say “ha! well I couldn’t have been THAT controlling [...]

Who Will Get Away Unpunished If You Get Unstuck? is a post from: Christchurch Psychologist. Dr Alice Boyes. Relationships Expert and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Copyright 2009-2010. All rights reserved.

How to Understand that Your Negative Thoughts Don’t Need to Be Controlled

Dr Alice Boyes — Fri, 03 Sep 2010 03:30:53 +0000

This is a very easy and quick exercise. What’s awesome about it is that it’s experiential. It requires you to physically experience something rather than attempting to learn only on an intellectual/logical level. Experiential learning is a far more powerful way to change your relationship with your private experiences (your thoughts, memories, sensations, evaluations, emotions) [...]

How to Understand that Your Negative Thoughts Don’t Need to Be Controlled is a post from: Christchurch Psychologist. Dr Alice Boyes. Relationships Expert and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Copyright 2009-2010. All rights reserved.

Practical Sleep Tips (Insomnia)

Dr Alice Boyes — Thu, 02 Sep 2010 03:59:03 +0000

- Only use your bedroom for sleep and sex. - Have a bedtime routine for cueing yourself into winding down for sleep, just as you would for a child. Stop doing stimulating activities at least 1-2 hours before bedtime. - Go to bed and get up at the same time everyday. - For when you [...]

Circadian Rhythms and Mood Disorders (e.g. Depression, Bipolar Disorder)

Dr Alice Boyes — Thu, 02 Sep 2010 03:44:46 +0000

Last month I answered some questions for a journalist writing an article on circadian rhythms and mood disorders (including depression and bipolar disorder). The article isn’t out yet but I wanted to give some practical information and tips because its an important topic. Circadian Rhythms are our 24 hour clock. They’re how we stay synchronized [...]

Circadian Rhythms and Mood Disorders (e.g. Depression, Bipolar Disorder) is a post from: Christchurch Psychologist. Dr Alice Boyes. Relationships Expert and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Copyright 2009-2010. All rights reserved.

Changing Your Relationship by Changing Your Own Behaviour Rather Than Trying To Directly Change Your Partner’s Behaviour

Dr Alice Boyes — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 02:42:35 +0000

Self change is tough. Trying to change someone else is usually banging your head against a brick wall. Ask yourself: How do I want my partner to be different? Write your answer on the closest piece of paper you have handy. Ask yourself: Why is that important to me? For example I want my partner [...]

Changing Your Relationship by Changing Your Own Behaviour Rather Than Trying To Directly Change Your Partner’s Behaviour is a post from: Christchurch Psychologist. Dr Alice Boyes. Relationships Expert and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Copyright 2009-2010. All rights reserved.

Worry/Anxiety: The Reassurance Seeking Trap

Dr Alice Boyes — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 00:21:28 +0000

Reassurance seeking is a common pattern in clients with high worry (e.g. Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Health Anxiety, Attachment/Relationship anxiety) The Reassurance Seeking Trap is that getting reassurance often works in the short term but then wears off, so you seek more. Excessive reassurance seeking has some negative consequences, which CRUELLY fuel greater worry and a [...]

Worry/Anxiety: The Reassurance Seeking Trap is a post from: Christchurch Psychologist. Dr Alice Boyes. Relationships Expert and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Copyright 2009-2010. All rights reserved.

The blog post where I share an embarrassing personal example…

Dr Alice Boyes — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 23:10:18 +0000

Some days, everything is going well and I think I’m a great psychologist. Some days I think I am indeed awesome, lol. But, there are moments when it pops into my head that “I’m useless”. I’m sharing this example to show how you can use two different approaches for dealing with these types of thoughts. [...]

The blog post where I share an embarrassing personal example… is a post from: Christchurch Psychologist. Dr Alice Boyes. Relationships Expert and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Copyright 2009-2010. All rights reserved.

Stress Reduction: Reducing the Demands on Your Memory (Anxiety, Depression)

Dr Alice Boyes — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 01:15:26 +0000

One of the most stress-reducing and time-saving things I’ve done in the last year has been to stick up a plastic 3M hook that I hang my keys on when I walk in the front door of my house. I would guess that this has saved me literally hours of searching for my keys and [...]

Stress Reduction: Reducing the Demands on Your Memory (Anxiety, Depression) is a post from: Christchurch Psychologist. Dr Alice Boyes. Relationships Expert and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Copyright 2009-2010. All rights reserved.