Anxiety

The idea for this post was triggered by this Wall Street Journal article by writer Rachel Shukert. The WSJ article is about women, but I think fear that admitting mistakes will make you less likable...

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If you are depressed or anxious (especially if you are socially anxious) try to catch yourself guessing – that someone doesn’t particularly like you, or is having negative thoughts about you – that someone is...

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Taking Yourself Seriously

July 30, 2010 | 0 Comments

I’m currently on my annual ‘sabbatical’ in New York City, hence the lack of posting lately. I will be back in New Zealand at the end of August and will start taking bookings for new...

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When people try to figure out their values it can be confusing. In my experience of working with clients, the most useful values are typically really simple ones that guide your actions in a helpful...

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Avoidant Coping is one of the main causes of out-of-control stress, depression, anxiety, low self esteem, relationship problems, and eating issues. Avoidant coping is about trying to avoid experiencing painful thoughts, feelings, memories, or sensations....

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Giving Your Negative Self Talk a Name

May 25, 2010 | 0 Comments

This is a Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) technique that lots of my clients report finding very useful. Its helpful for identifying and diffusing your negative self talk. First, identify some of your negative self talk...

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This is one of my favorite tips for feeling calmer and more confident… …Try to catch yourself when you are avoiding something. There are two types of avoidant coping you need to catch. Type 1....

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This tip is from a surprising/unlikely source: international , New Zealand but I use it alot and lots of clients have really liked it. The tip is called the 80/20 principle. The idea (as it...

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Opposite action is a new way of thinking about what to do when you’re feeling – anger – sadness/disappointment – anxiety, or – guilt/shame/embarrassment. The ways people habitually respond to these emotions often make their...

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DIY Psychological Challenge My DIY psychological challenge to you for this week is to ask someone (outside your family) to do something where you expect the answer will be “No”. Why Does Being Told “No”...

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