Relationships

Something I’ve learned as a therapist is that people keep a heck of a lot of their best qualities hidden inside rather than expressing those qualities so other people can see them. Because people are...

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When people are feeling negative emotions (e.g. due to depression, anxiety, or relationship problems), their thinking becomes more negative, narrow, and rigid. People tend to get very “all or nothing” and “black and white.” Achieving...

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Who Will Get Away Unpunished If You Get Unstuck?

September 6, 2010 | 0 Comments

Relationships Let’s say: You see your partner as controlling. Let’s also say: this has large elements of truth. There are 2 psychological barriers to getting unstuck here 1. If you get unstuck (stop being controlled),...

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A hallmark of psychological health is the ability to think flexibly. When people get depressed, are highly anxious, or are feeling high levels of negative emotions for other reasons (such as relationship unhappiness), their thinking...

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Here are 3 cycles I frequently see in people who are having relationships problems. These particularly commonly occur when one or both partners has low self esteem. Person feels frustrated > Person acts out in...

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Are there things YOU think would/might be helpful to you if you did them, but for some reason you feel resistant to trying your idea? It could be anything but examples include: – devising a...

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Lots of people don’t do things they’d like to do for fear of rejection and the corresponding disappointment. If this is you, then you can break this pattern of avoidance by practicing exposing yourself to...

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Media sexualization of children. A resource and practical advice for parents. Practical tips 1. Ask your children what they like about their idols. For example, if your daughter looks up to Miley Cyrus ask her...

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Schedule a Therapy Session with Yourself

August 13, 2010 | 0 Comments

You can try this even if you’ve never been to therapy… I typically give this tip to clients when they move from weekly appointments* to less frequent appointments: Keep your therapy appointment time but schedule...

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Example Mary notices herself feeling irritated when her brother in law gives her advice about how to do something she already knows how to do. She thinks: He must think I’m really stupid if he...

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